One of my pastoral mentors has been exhorting his church to ask some real questions about hungering and thirsting for righteousness. What really makes you happy? What really makes you smile, laugh, or cry? When do you feel your biggest sense accomplishment? I’ve spent the last 48 hours pondering what I really have an appetite for. Is it for righteousness or the things that I seek for my own sense of validation and purpose?
One of my biggest struggles in this area is feeling the need to validate my success. You see, I went to UVA, the “public” Ivy League school and got one of the top business degrees in the country. Afterward, I was offered an auditing position at one of the world’s top accounting firms. Feeling the Lord calling me to full-time ministry work, I turned down that job. Ever since however, I’ve always felt the need show those around me, close and far, that somehow my life mirrors the success I would’ve had if I had taken that job. I hungered and thirsted for a life that showed forth success.
God says in Isaiah 55: 2&3:
Why spend your money on food that does not give you strength?
Why pay for food that does you no good?
Listen to me, and you will eat what is good.
You will enjoy the finest food.
Come to me with your ears wide open.
Listen, and you will find life.
What a wake up call!! I was hungering for things that can’t satisfy. Listening to my Father, the lover of my soul, that’s what eating good is. Instead of exhausting all of this energy in my “so called” reputation, why not put as much emotional energy into widening my ears to hear God. That’s when I find life.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Monday, August 23, 2010
Genesis 16|13
About 2 years ago, God began to deal with me about a certain group of individuals who were suffering a great injustice. Victims of a trade marked by immorality...human trafficking. For whatever reason, God was sharpening my attention to the men, women and children persecuted in this life. It seemed everywhere I went there was someone or something always pointing to this issue. Recently, the Lord began to take me deeper. He not only continued to increase my sensitivity for these individuals, He began to reveal to me why He was doing so.
I was addicted to pornography. For years, I battled with this issue and the addictions that come along with it. As I prayed, the Lord spoke to me and said “you know what it’s like to be caught in a web of sexual addiction and not be able to get out yourself.” It was then I realized why God had given me such a tender heart. He was calling me to help those bound like I was.
Third Realm Ministries and One Voice is excited to partner with Genesis 16|13. Founded by Amey Adkins, this ministry specializes in the worldwide mobilization of resources to those enslaved by human trafficking. Genesis 16|13’s mission is to bring to a message to these victims that God sees them, and to find practical ways to liberate them. It also provides the children of enslaved women with equitable educational and economic opportunities. This way, a new generation isn’t bound by the web of trafficking.
To accomplish this goal, Genesis 16|13 is establishing financial trusts for prevention units in local rural areas prone to trafficking. These areas include Haiti, Thailand, Vietnam, Cambodia, India, Uganda, Rwanda, Sudan, Mozambique, Zimbabwe, Nepal, Canada and the United States.
Jesus says in Luke 4:18 “The Spirit of the Lord is on me because he has anointed me….to proclaim liberty to the captives.” Many of us in One Voice know what it’s like to be in a state of captivity. We also know what it’s like to experience the freedom that only a relationship with Christ brings. We want to become His extended hands in the earth. Given this, proceeds from our newest project, Saturate Us, are going to support the efforts of Genesis 16|13. We believe a better world is possible and pray that God gives us the grace to make it happen.
I was addicted to pornography. For years, I battled with this issue and the addictions that come along with it. As I prayed, the Lord spoke to me and said “you know what it’s like to be caught in a web of sexual addiction and not be able to get out yourself.” It was then I realized why God had given me such a tender heart. He was calling me to help those bound like I was.
Third Realm Ministries and One Voice is excited to partner with Genesis 16|13. Founded by Amey Adkins, this ministry specializes in the worldwide mobilization of resources to those enslaved by human trafficking. Genesis 16|13’s mission is to bring to a message to these victims that God sees them, and to find practical ways to liberate them. It also provides the children of enslaved women with equitable educational and economic opportunities. This way, a new generation isn’t bound by the web of trafficking.
To accomplish this goal, Genesis 16|13 is establishing financial trusts for prevention units in local rural areas prone to trafficking. These areas include Haiti, Thailand, Vietnam, Cambodia, India, Uganda, Rwanda, Sudan, Mozambique, Zimbabwe, Nepal, Canada and the United States.
Jesus says in Luke 4:18 “The Spirit of the Lord is on me because he has anointed me….to proclaim liberty to the captives.” Many of us in One Voice know what it’s like to be in a state of captivity. We also know what it’s like to experience the freedom that only a relationship with Christ brings. We want to become His extended hands in the earth. Given this, proceeds from our newest project, Saturate Us, are going to support the efforts of Genesis 16|13. We believe a better world is possible and pray that God gives us the grace to make it happen.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Renewed Strength
You know I'm just really going through one of those times in life where I'd really rather just not pursue the destiny of God. I'd rather just be a person enclosed in his comfort zone, making money, living in my house with a wife and 2.5 children, pursuing the American dream. See when you start this journey of God-given, Jesus-led, Holy Spirit-inspired destiny and give your life to it a lot of times you don't consider the emotional strain of it at the beginning. That's where I am; emotionally strained and I am emotionally strained not because of "God" but because of my faulty expectation of who "God" is and what He will do for you. See for some reason we feel that if we pursue something that God led us to do and it some how fails or doesn't work out that it wasn't truly God. But who said that?? Where is that in the bible?? Last I checked it was the Holy Spirit that led Jesus to the wilderness and God who sent the children of Israel into the desert. I also know that the righteous must live by faith meaning that there are going to be things that we do in our pursuit of our God given destiny and our growing relationship with Him that we won't know the outcome of. God knows, we don't. He's simply looking for someone to walk out on water not calculate the laws of physics before they make a move. Our responsibility is to believe and act from that belief, His is to bring the outcome.
Let me explain all this random babbling. The reason why I'm in an emotional rut is because I'm realizing that something I know the Lord led me to do didn't turn out the best way according to natural and earthly standards. By the way, earthly and natural standards are not necessarily bad, they're just not authoritative. There's no power behind them. Remember the natural speaks of the spiritual. Whenever God births something in the spirit, it's a reflection of what happens in a natural birth. When God births something out, like a natural birth there's a huge mess that needs to be cleaned up. I'm learning that the obligation to clean up the mess doesn't diminish the value of the new life that has been born. After the mess is cleaned up, the child will live on. It'll continue to make mistakes, but it's life and it's growth are the most important things.
One scripture that God has laid on my heart about all of this is Isaiah 40:31. It's a very common typical text that many have used but God showed me a little something different about it this time. It says "they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength." The way we usually interpret this scripture is that a renewing of our strength will come when we receive what it is that we've been waiting for. That's not the whole picture though. Notice it says they that wait shall renew. In other words, your renewed strength comes during the process of waiting not when what it is that you've been waiting for manifests. I'm seeing that my strength is being renewed as I do my best with the Lord's help to go through the process of cleaning up the mess of this birth, waiting on the Lord to continue to grow what he just manifested. Who knew that at my weakest point, in a tumultuous emotional low, I would find new strength and power that I never knew I had. Here at the bottom for some crazy reason I feel more renewed than I have in a long time!
Let me explain all this random babbling. The reason why I'm in an emotional rut is because I'm realizing that something I know the Lord led me to do didn't turn out the best way according to natural and earthly standards. By the way, earthly and natural standards are not necessarily bad, they're just not authoritative. There's no power behind them. Remember the natural speaks of the spiritual. Whenever God births something in the spirit, it's a reflection of what happens in a natural birth. When God births something out, like a natural birth there's a huge mess that needs to be cleaned up. I'm learning that the obligation to clean up the mess doesn't diminish the value of the new life that has been born. After the mess is cleaned up, the child will live on. It'll continue to make mistakes, but it's life and it's growth are the most important things.
One scripture that God has laid on my heart about all of this is Isaiah 40:31. It's a very common typical text that many have used but God showed me a little something different about it this time. It says "they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength." The way we usually interpret this scripture is that a renewing of our strength will come when we receive what it is that we've been waiting for. That's not the whole picture though. Notice it says they that wait shall renew. In other words, your renewed strength comes during the process of waiting not when what it is that you've been waiting for manifests. I'm seeing that my strength is being renewed as I do my best with the Lord's help to go through the process of cleaning up the mess of this birth, waiting on the Lord to continue to grow what he just manifested. Who knew that at my weakest point, in a tumultuous emotional low, I would find new strength and power that I never knew I had. Here at the bottom for some crazy reason I feel more renewed than I have in a long time!
Thursday, May 22, 2008
From Frustration to Worship
Ok so right now I'm in Greenwood, MS. about to attend the funeral services of my cousin who was only 22 years old when he died. He was shot unexpectedly and so the situation is very heart breaking for my family and I. On top of this, I have another cousin who only 5 months ago was stabbed, mutilated, and killed by her husband who then hung himself. She was 35. Needless to say it's been pretty rough on my family here recently.
So again I'm here in Mississippi and for some crazy reason my filters are way down. I've been up since 4:00 this morning traveling by plane, bus, shuttle, and rental car. I just got off the phone with my sister and I was telling her that my filters are so down that they're actually underground. For those who aren't clear by what I mean when I say 'filters' I mean those mental blocks I keep up so that my flesh doesn't slip and gratify itself. So my filters are what cause me to turn the TV when people are basically having sex on the basic cable channels, tune out the profane words of my grandma's loud next door neighbors frying fish outside, and not cuss myself because of stupidity and ignorance in the world.
I don't know if you've ever reached the place where you were just physically, emotionally, psychologically, mentally, and every other -ally you can think of, drained! Usually this is when our filters go down. It happens most often during the times of the day when you're the most tempted with your individual carnal battle so most of us have a filter struggle at least once a day. Then there are times where your filters are so down that you feel like you're right at the edge of just losing sanctification. It's like what the heck, I'm gonna cuss because that's just what I feel right now. Well that's exactly where I am right now. I usually get like this after venting my frustrations about religious retardation. When the elders of the church patronize the youth and stifle their radical expressions of true worship because it's not comfortable or familiar. When church leaders (including myself) get into a place where they're so into their religious box that they don't even realize that God is moving in a completely different direction than what's in their minds. When the spirit of God falls heavily and we can't control it so we ease it out by singing a song or speaking a 'word' instead of just letting God be God. When ministers express their own spiritual thoughts and pass it off as spiritual revelation that God told them. When the spiritually immature fall prey to such ministers because of lack of working out their own relationship with God, etc., etc. But in the midst of all of this frustration, I hear the Lord speaking to me saying turn your frustrations to worship and intercession not bitterness.
Psalm 73: 16 & 17 says "when I tried to understand all this, it was oppressive to me till I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny." Basically at a time when this psalmist was tempted to be bitter because of all of the oppression he saw around him, he ran to the sanctuary of God where in the end he concluded that instead of being bitter about all that was around him, he was running to God's face. What would happen if every time we were frustrated we began to worship God. You know, take the attention off of ourselves and turn it to Him. I believe that's one of the reasons why we as believers haven't been as effective as we can be as a church. We need to priortize getting to God's sanctuary before we are overtaken by bitterness. Like most passionate Christians, I hate it when my filters go down because that's when temptation hits the hardest. Wouldn't life be so much easier if my filters stayed up all the time? But maybe the purpose of them going down is so that I continue to have motive and drive to run to God's sanctuary. See His perspective and not mine. In this our attitude becomes like the psalmist who says in verse 28 of this same chapter "but as for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge; I will tell of all your deeds."
So where are you going to run when you're frustrated?
So again I'm here in Mississippi and for some crazy reason my filters are way down. I've been up since 4:00 this morning traveling by plane, bus, shuttle, and rental car. I just got off the phone with my sister and I was telling her that my filters are so down that they're actually underground. For those who aren't clear by what I mean when I say 'filters' I mean those mental blocks I keep up so that my flesh doesn't slip and gratify itself. So my filters are what cause me to turn the TV when people are basically having sex on the basic cable channels, tune out the profane words of my grandma's loud next door neighbors frying fish outside, and not cuss myself because of stupidity and ignorance in the world.
I don't know if you've ever reached the place where you were just physically, emotionally, psychologically, mentally, and every other -ally you can think of, drained! Usually this is when our filters go down. It happens most often during the times of the day when you're the most tempted with your individual carnal battle so most of us have a filter struggle at least once a day. Then there are times where your filters are so down that you feel like you're right at the edge of just losing sanctification. It's like what the heck, I'm gonna cuss because that's just what I feel right now. Well that's exactly where I am right now. I usually get like this after venting my frustrations about religious retardation. When the elders of the church patronize the youth and stifle their radical expressions of true worship because it's not comfortable or familiar. When church leaders (including myself) get into a place where they're so into their religious box that they don't even realize that God is moving in a completely different direction than what's in their minds. When the spirit of God falls heavily and we can't control it so we ease it out by singing a song or speaking a 'word' instead of just letting God be God. When ministers express their own spiritual thoughts and pass it off as spiritual revelation that God told them. When the spiritually immature fall prey to such ministers because of lack of working out their own relationship with God, etc., etc. But in the midst of all of this frustration, I hear the Lord speaking to me saying turn your frustrations to worship and intercession not bitterness.
Psalm 73: 16 & 17 says "when I tried to understand all this, it was oppressive to me till I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny." Basically at a time when this psalmist was tempted to be bitter because of all of the oppression he saw around him, he ran to the sanctuary of God where in the end he concluded that instead of being bitter about all that was around him, he was running to God's face. What would happen if every time we were frustrated we began to worship God. You know, take the attention off of ourselves and turn it to Him. I believe that's one of the reasons why we as believers haven't been as effective as we can be as a church. We need to priortize getting to God's sanctuary before we are overtaken by bitterness. Like most passionate Christians, I hate it when my filters go down because that's when temptation hits the hardest. Wouldn't life be so much easier if my filters stayed up all the time? But maybe the purpose of them going down is so that I continue to have motive and drive to run to God's sanctuary. See His perspective and not mine. In this our attitude becomes like the psalmist who says in verse 28 of this same chapter "but as for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge; I will tell of all your deeds."
So where are you going to run when you're frustrated?
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